North Korean floating penis crisis heating up

The National Reporter

More threats are emerging from behind the 38th parallel as North Korea’s tyrannical despot Kim Jong Un steps up  his threat to launch a floating penis over the U.S. in retaliation for the mysterious floating penis that was first seen over Pittsburgh Pennsylvania and first reported right here on the National Reporter.
This video was smuggled out of that communist dictatorship at great risk to The National Reporters spy network that is operating inside of North Korea and head quartered in that country’s capital a mere two blocks from the home of Kim Jong Un.

It is rumored that the U.S. is building up air defenses along the west coast and are prepared to engage any flying objects floating in from the direction of North Korea.
There are also several reports from unidentified sources that the U.S. may be building a floating penis balloon nearly a mile long in the Nevada desert.
If these reports are true, the U.S. and North Korea may be headed to a dire impasse in diplomatic relations.

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Mysterious sounds heard in the Bermuda triangle

The National Reporter
On January 16, 2015, merchant seamen aboard a cargo vessel were nearly deafened by a very loud sound that seemed to come out of no where.

“I don’t know what the hell it was, it scared the hell out of all of us.” Seaman John Swurley told us. “We were on deck checking to make sure the rigging hadn’t slipped out of place from a storm we went through the night before when all of a sudden this sound, like a roar started up. It got louder and louder until we were all holding our ears.”
“It reminded me of a big animal roaring, like a Lion or something, but it was coming from everywhere. The sky, the sea. Everywhere all at once.” Seaman Frank Kelly explained.
The National Reporter – How long did this sound last?
“It started up and got louder and louder then it faded away. I guess it lasted about a full minute.”
“Yeah,..I would say about a minute. It was loud as all hell then it just passed by and disappeared.” John Swurley added.
The National Reporter – Could it have been another ship or an airplane?
“No. absolutely not.”Frank Kelly said. “There was nothing around, there were no other ships or planes flying by. We were all alone out there and there wasn’t a cloud in the sky, so it wasn’t thunder.”
The National Reporter – Have you reported this to your employer?
“They told us to keep our mouths shut about it and the government threatened us.” He said.
“The media acted like we were carrying Ebola when we went into their offices. They didn’t want to have anything to do with us or the story.”
The National Reporter – Well, you have The National Reporter on your side.
We here at The National Reporter are not afraid to tell the truth.
The government doesn’t scare us, we can assure of that.
“Yes, The National Reporter has always been a very reliable source of information.” Frank Kelly said.
“That’s right, unlike the sleazy tabloids who make up fantastic story’s just so they can sell advertising space to greedy corporations, The National Reporter can always be depended on for bringing the truth to the public.” John Swurley said.

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© The National Reporter, Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to The National Reporter with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.