Origin of the mysterious electronic tooth implant has been revealed!

The truth about the baffling electronic tooth implant has shocked the scientific community

The truth about the baffling electronic tooth implant has shocked the scientific community

The National Reporter
Shocking news concerning the mysterious electronic tooth implant that was reported in The National Reporter five years ago has finally been revealed.

Electronic implant discovered in mans tooth”

The origin and the method in which it was inserted into Wally Hansons tooth has been discovered by a scientific team of forensic experts in Washington DC.
The National Reporter was on hand when the news of the discovery was announced.
The National Reporter – How did you discover the secret of the electronic tooth implant?
The person we had begun interviewing at this time was obviously unaware of who was speaking to him.
“And who might I ask wants to know?”
The National Reporter – Pardon me professor, I should have introduced myself.
My name is Ace Flashman, I am a reporter for The National Reporter.
“Ah yes, the National Reporter.” He said with a smile. “One of the most reliable sources of the latest scientific discovery’s anywhere and the winner of the International Reporters Association award for honesty, integrity and truthfulness in journalism.”
The National Reporter – That’s right professor. We at The National Reporter do our best to bring the truth to the public, unlike the tabloids who sell ridiculous lies to them to make a quick buck.”
“Yes, I find The National Reporters reputation for honesty, integrity and truthfulness very reassuring when I need to do important research that could have dire consequences for the world if it was inaccurate.”
The National Reporter – That’s right professor. We at The National Reporter go that extra ten yards to make sure our readers are getting nothing but facts on the issues that are effecting the world today.
“Don’t you mean nine yards?”
The National Reporter – We here at The National Reporter like to think that we go an extra yard for our loyal readers because they are worth the effort.
“That is a very noble outlook.” The professor said. “That is why you won the award for Honesty, integrity and truthfulness in journalism.”
The National Reporter – Yes, that is correct. And we won it a second time this year as you can see when you read our webpage.
“Well, I must say that you certainly deserve it.” he said.
The National Reporter – Why, thank you professor. That means a lot coming from such a distinguished gentleman as yourself.
“I am not alone in my opinion of your fine news service.” He said. “All of us here at the scientific institute are avid readers of The National Reporter and look forward to your latest reports.”
The National Reporter – Why, thank you again Professor. That is quite a complement coming from a loyal reader and a person of your stature.

Now professor, we understand that you and the scientific team here at the science institute have discovered the origin of the electronic implant in the tooth and also how it was inserted, is this true?
The National Reporter – That is really news. What was the reactrion of your team when they made the discovery?
“Most of us were shocked, yet the discovery had a calming effect on the members of the team.” he said.
The National Reporter – I could imagine it would have been quite a relief to everyone involved in such a lengthy research project to finally come to a conclusion solving the mystery.
“Yes, it was. It was a much needed relief.” He said. “The team and I were on the verge of calling it quits several times over the past few years. At times it became very frustrating as theory after theory fell apart and we had to start all over from the beginning.”
The National Reporter – Yes, I can understand why that would be frustrating.
“At first the discovery seemed so far fetched that none of us believed and we nearly dropped it to explore other possibilitys.”
The National Reporter – It’s a good thing you decided to continue on the theory that led your team to the truth.
“Yes, that is correct.” He said.
The National Reporter – How has this discovery impacted the scientific community?
“It has had quite an impact, especially in the field involving the technology of the implant and the method in which it was inserted into the mans tooth.”
The National Reporter – I bet it has. Have you contacted Wally Hanson with the news yet?
“Yes, We have.” The professor said.
The National Reporter – Was he as surprised as you and your team?
“Yes, he was. He was stunned when we told him what it was and how it ended up in his tooth without his knowledge of how it got there or what it was.”
The National Reporter – Who wouldn’t be stunned to find out something like that?
“Ha,ha,..not many people that I can think of.” The professor laughed.
The National Reporter – Well, thank you for your time Professor. Our readers will be excited when they find out that the mystery has been solved.
“I am sure they will.” he said.

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36 Responses to Origin of the mysterious electronic tooth implant has been revealed!

  1. GinnyT12 says:

    Finally the mystery has been solved.
    Now we all know.

  2. Pingback: Mysterious electronic implant discovered in mans tooth |

  3. Pam Lancaster says:

    Still doesn’t give any info. How was it done and what was the purpose and how did Mr. Hanson not know? Article just compliments each other.

    • Pam, You’re retarded.

      • Savannah says:

        That’s mean. I don’t even know how it got in there. if you know explain because nowhere in the article that I saw said anything about how it got in there or why it is in there.

      • Vegapunk says:

        It’s a fake story on a fake news site – mystery solved 😉


        – The reporter is named Ace Flashman – No one is named that, ever.
        – The professor has no name, and his university affiliation isn’t listed. He also spends most of his time kissing the ass of Ace Flashman, which doesn’t exactly fit with the leader of a “scientific team of forensic experts.” Something tells me he’d have better things to do than read a crappy blog with crappy troll articles.
        – There are about a thousand spelling errors in the article – an “award winning” news site doesn’t have spell-check, or editors?
        – There is no explanation hidden within the article, because there is no explanation. There never was an implant, there never was a mystery. It’s fake. The people here are just being dicks. The ‘wisdom’ needed to figure out the mystery is just that you should know better than to believe this kind of crap.

        Sorry for ruining the fun, but I’ll wear the Captain Obvious hat willingly to save a few people from wasting a few minutes of their lives, like I wasted a few minutes of my life posting this. I’ll never get that back – I hope you’re happy, assholes. 😉

      • Piggomuzzie says:

        It is a fake story on a news parody website, anyone can see that without your astounding epiphany.
        But there really is a solution to the origin of the mysterious electronic tooth implant in this follow up.
        You are just too stupid to figure it out and no one is going to reveal it to you.
        If you can’t figure it out, tough.

  4. Savannah says:

    that didn’t help at all!!!! How did it get in there?? And why is it there!!!!!!!!!

    • Billy the Clunk necked twaddle puss says:

      How could you not know the solution?
      It is so obvious if you read the article carefully.

      • Cal26738 says:

        I just figured it out.
        You have to read the story very carefully.
        If you read it really carefully will see the solution as to what it is and how it got there.

  5. Ashes l. says:

    I don’t get it either… can someone just put the answer?

    • Giving away the answer would be like a magician telling everyone how he is going to do his trick.
      It’s no fun if you know how it is done.
      You have to read the story very carefully.

  6. alex says:

    at least tell me what I’m looking for.

    • Shotgun245 says:

      You are looking for the solution to the mystery of the electronic tooth implant that is hidden within the above article.
      Read with wisdom and you will solve the puzzle.

  7. alex says:

    I’m happy to declare i have no wisdom if it gets me the answer faster.

    • Shotgun245 says:

      Without wisdom your quest for the solution is doomed to failure.

      • Phil Sweetsong says:

        I read this damned thing over and over and I could not figure it out.
        I just read it again and it suddenly came to me.
        It is so simple!
        It is like one of those magic pictures with the space ship in it.
        You can not see it until you look through the picture then the space ship suddenly appears right before your eyes.
        No one can tell you the answer.
        You have to see it for your self.

  8. Shelley says:

    I have read the article several times. I still don’t get it!!

    • Vegapunk says:

      This is a troll site full of trolls. 🙂 I suppose it serves a purpose as an exercise in critical thinking however. >.>

      • Piggomuzzie says:

        It sounds like someone is butt hurt because they can’t figure it out.
        Trolls, trolls, trolls.LOL!

      • Sonofflubber says:

        I only had to read it once and I got the answer.
        Its simple.
        Why is it that the people who try the hardest to sound like intellectuals are always the dumbest fucks in the comment sections on sites like this?
        It’s a fictional story, dumb ass.

      • Fiskars says:

        Why is the word troll becoming so over used by retarded people recently?
        It seems like everywhere you go on the internets it’s trolls, trolls, trolls!
        Anyone that says something that someone doesn’t like is a troll.
        Troll seems to be passing ‘racist’ as the idiots favorite meaningless insult.

      • How cute, a retard learned a new term.
        You have absolutely no idea what critical thinking is.

  9. Beligerant says:

    I just figured it out.

  10. Congalyne says:

    Wow, the solution really does appear right before your eyes.
    Its so simple!
    Please, no one reveal the answer to the people who cant figure it out!
    Let them earn it.

  11. Mauna Horad says:

    This is the biggest crock of bullshit journalism i think I’ve encountered to date! To grab the readers attention initially with an article so mysterious and baffling is one thing, but to then draw one in even further with claims that the mystery had been solved and the following article would relay it, is a really sad and pitiful way to get readers.

    • GongoMongo says:

      You must be really bad at puzzles.
      That’s what it is, it’s just a puzzle.
      If you ever figure it out you will understand why no one will reveal the answer.
      It took me a little while to get it, but once I saw it It was simple.

  12. Glen says:


  13. Anna B says:

    Did it look like a little black dot behind the top front tooth? I have something in my tooth that I wasn’t born with or have done myself. It appeared a couple years ago. I’m trying to figure out how to remove it…

    • Anna says:

      I already know there are things out there were not suppose to know about, or people say aren’t real…
      Seeing is believing!

  14. Lars Jone Larsen says:

    So,how do you snuff out a bunch of alleged trolls inspiration and drive for nastily commenting on these
    alleged readers lack of insight into journalistic lowlife morals…? You trick them into letting the sun rise behind their backs,and then you poke them with a truth they haven’t seen themselves: And then:BAAAM!
    There actually is a cryptic hint to the solution to this story: If you take a good look at the picture of the implant itself,you will soon see that it has no depth to it. It’s lacking a third spacial dimension:
    Depth: Or truth if you want: It’s all two-dimensional- And I won’t even reveal what can be said by the inclusion of the one-of fourth transitional dimension-Time.

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