Breaking news; Will the real Osama Bin Laden please stand up?

Bin Laden is a dwarf

Pint sized terrorist Osama Bin Laden sitting with one of his advisors

The National Reporter
Photographs captured by the U.S. army yesterday that were hidden deep inside a cave once used by Al Queda operatives has revealed a startling revelation which has been unknown up to now.
Osama Bin Laden is dwarf.
The National Reporter  met with the commanding officer of fire base zero charlie, which is located in the hills a few miles from where the photographs were found.
We spoke to General Winston Adams of the tenth division about the shocking discovery.
“It was really quite a shock when we examined the pictures and saw who it was.” He said. “Ever since the hunt for Bin Laden began it was assumed from his photographs that he was over six feet tall.”
The National Reporter  “What do you estimate his height to be?”
“Well,.. judging from the rifle next to him on the sofa, I would say he is about two and a half feet tall.” He told us.
The National Reporter  “Correct me if I am wrong General Adams, but didn’t a soldier report seeing a dwarf fleeing from a cave he was checking last year?”
“Yes, we have reopened his report and found that a photograph was taken at the time which shows a dwarf resembling Osama Bin Laden scampering out of the cave right in front of him. Unfortunatly he disapeared into a small hole before the soldier could grab him. He dropped a grenade in after him, but he got away. After we saw this eye opening photograph, We are now positive that it was Bin Laden.”

Osama giving the slip to a marine

Photograph taken of Osama Bin Laden last year as he dashed from a cave he was hidding in.

After our meeting with general Adams, The National Reporter  went to Cairo to see if we could dig up some more evidence of the diminutive terrorist.
It didn’t take long.
Here is private family photograph of Osama Bin Laden that was lifted by  The National Reporter  from his parents home while they were out for the evening.
It is apparent that dwarfism runs in the Bin laden family as evidenced by the photograph.

Obama with dog

Osama Bin Laden with his uncle, Hussien Bin Laden in the familys dog stable. Osama is seen here petting his favorite riding dog, Habbib.

According to the inscription written on the back of the photograph, Habbib was Osama’s favorite riding dog.
That is, he rode the dog like it was a horse on his familys private race track.
Now it can be understood why the search for Osama Bin Laden has been so difficult.
The army has been looking for a man who is reported to be over six feet tall while in reality, Osama Bin Laden is just slightly over two feet tall and able to crawl into tunnels that an average sized person could barely stick their arm in. 
 The National Reporter will keep our readers udated on this startling new twist in the Osama Bin Laden saga as it unfolds.

Click here for more breaking news from The National Reporter
© The National Reporter, 2009. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to The National Reporter with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About Ace Flashman
Grabbing up all the hot news flashes from around the nation and bringing them to you!!!

6 Responses to Breaking news; Will the real Osama Bin Laden please stand up?

  1. Ash says:

    these pictures appear to b fake

  2. Ace Flashman says:

    The pictures only appear to be fake because of the angle of the sun and the poor quality film used.
    It is very difficult to get good quality film in Afganistan, so we had to use what was available.
    Sorry for the confusion.

  3. lol he is serious... says:

    It’s almost funny. No really, it is. Seriously. So close yet so far…

  4. Fubsy says:

    These are definitely legit!

  5. emily says:

    Is this like some form of The Onion? I truely find it hard that this “dwarf” would be taken seriously as a leader? Not that I have anything against dwarfs. I just don’t know.

    • Ace Flashman says:

      The National Reporter is nothing at all like the Onion.
      The Onion dwells in fantasy and bogus storys.
      The National Reporter deals in facts and the truth.
      We here at The National Reporter report the storys that the main stream media is afraid to print for fear of losing their sponsors while the Onion makes up laughingly silly storys to amuse their low brow readership.

      Thank you for taking an interest in The National Reporter and we hope that you will continue to enjoy our exciting news reports and videos as we bring them to you.

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